Do you often feel triggered for reasons you can’t really understand?
Sometimes life situations trigger long-standing habitual thought patterns, narratives and beliefs, which open old emotional wounds.
When a thought pattern and accompanying emotion feel familiar and irrational in the context of the situation, almost like an overreaction, then it is most likely an old wound getting bumped up against.
The question to ask yourself in this situation is, “How old do I feel right now?”
The answer to this will give you a clue as to where this old emotional wound originated.
Then, ask yourself, “What was going on at age (5, 7, 13, etc.) that is reminiscent of what is going on presently”
The originating incident may or may not come clearly to you, but either way, you can ask yourself, “What is the story or meaning I gave this incident or time period when I was a child?”
The story is often about your need to behave or not behave in a certain way to get attention or love from your caregivers.
The next question to ask yourself is, “What does Lil Me need to hear to change the narrative?”
Most likely, it’s along the lines of:
It’s not your fault.
You are loved.
You are worthy.
You are perfect as you are.
I love you.
You are not alone.
I am here with you, and I have your back.
I’m so sorry.
When you know what your inner-child needs to hear, then you can be the one to tell them just that.
As the emotions arise around letting go of the old narrative and belief, you can actively process them.
So, focus your conscious awareness on the physical sensations of the emotion when you feel it. Stay present with the feeling and your inner-child. Remember, nothing in your childhood is your fault or was your responsibility.
However, now that you are an adult, it is your responsibility to actively participate in your own healing.
You are no longer existing in that hurtful time. You are here now, and now is the time to forgive, change the narrative to something empowering and true, process the emotions, and move forward with more freedom to choose aligned responses and behaviors.
As you close out your inner-child work, always invite your younger self to “come home.”
Reintegrate your sweet little self back into the whole of you. Hug your child self into your heart and let them know they are safe and loved — because you’re their caregiver now.